hello and welcome to the Intuitive
Business Mentor podcast
with your host me Amy
so today we are talking all about imposter syndrome
I was on one of our mastermind calls a few nights ago
and the topic of imposter syndrome came up
and almost everybody that was on the call
was like please yes talk about imposter syndrome
and I like to give the people what they want so
let's talk about imposter syndrome today
first of all I wanna start with it is very normal
it is very normal to feel
worried about your own skills and what you can
do for someone else
across all fields all professions
I would say all humans
I would also say if you don't have any bit of this
I would probably be a little worried
I think anyone who has a little worry about
am I going to be able to perform and deliver
what I say I can per I will perform and deliver
if you don't have that
I would be a little worried for you because to me
having
like a healthy amount of that is healthy
I think because I do think it's important that we are
delivering what we say we're going to deliver
to our clients and the promises we make
that we are fulfilling on them if you were not worried
at all about fulfilling those promises
that I think is more of a problem
than having a bit of worry about it
so for all of you here if you have any worry about that
I don't think that needs to be a bad thing
it becomes a bad thing when it
stops us from actually taking action
so
I would say number one it's very normal
again I would think it was a little weird
if you didn't have any of this
that you were worried about and
number two I think like I said I think this is
it goes for all like authentic genuine humans
however I do think there's even a deeper layer to this
because of the work
you do if you're listening to this podcast
most likely it is pretty intangible
if it has anything to do with intuition coaching
spirituality any of that
it is hard to prove it's hard to say this is 100%
fact and this is what I said I would do and here I am
here is me doing it and I'm telling you the truth
it is a little there's an there's a like an added layer
because of just kind of
the industry that you're in so I think it's also
important to just kind of call that out a little that
yes this is normal for I think all professions
and all humans
who are like being genuine in what they're
serving and offering to people
but I do think there's an even added
layer to this when you're working
in this way for anyone that would be listening to this
so I I do think that's a little important to touch on
okay
now what do
what do we find ourselves doing
this is important I think to reflect on
if you are finding yourself stuck
because of imposter syndrome because of fear
of I'm not going to be able to deliver my skills
aren't good
enough someone's gonna find out that I'm not as good as I say I am
any of that
it would be helpful I think to reflect
on what what are you doing
to kind of counteract that
because a lot of us what we will do
is take more courses get more certifications
do more learning do more planning
do more thinking about taking
action but not actually taking action so basically
we try to kind of logic our ways out
logic our way out of feeling
the uncomfortable feelings of imposter syndrome
and most of the time when we're doing that
we are doing everything but actually taking action
anything but actually doing the thing
so it might be helpful for you to notice
okay have I been
doing any of these things or something else
that is keeping me
with this feeling of imposter syndrome
I think it's gonna go away from these things I'm doing
but nothing's making it go away and it'll still
it is still here and I am still stuck because of it
it would be helpful for you to know what you're doing
that's keeping you there
and now the
the refrain for me at least my perspective on this is
we do not need the imposter syndrome
feelings to go away we want them to go away
we want them to go away
of course we want them to go away
what human wants to feel uncomfortable feelings
none of us
so of course it's normal to want it to go away however
I don't think
the things that we typically
do to try to make it go away
actually work to make it go away and so the
from my perspective the only the only way sort of
out or to lessen
the feelings of the imposter syndrome are not
to need them to go away
what that looks like is allowing
those uncomfortable feelings to be there
and still taking the uncomfortable action
so the goal
at least from my perspective is
we do not need the imposter syndrome
feelings the uncomfortable feelings to go away
what would most likely be aligned
is to allow them to come with us
and still do the thing
so we're not trying to get rid of them
we are allowing them to be there
which I know is deeply uncomfortable and no fun
and probably not what you wanna hear however
through doing the uncomfortable thing
while the imposter feelings are there
from what I've experienced is the only way to lessen
the feelings of the imposter syndrome
so really the only way to get unstuck and to
have this feel better is to actually do the thing
and that does require like a lot of courage
I am not like I know I'm glossing
over this like it seems so easy just go do the thing
however what you are doing
is going to require a lot of courage if you are here to
serve people and help people and that's part of your like life purpose
and your calling
you do need
there it there's a level of like deep courageousness
that you will need to be able to do that
and what is on the other side of that
is a million things but one of them is the imposter
feelings the uncomfortableness of that will dissipate
now I'm not going to tell you that it's gonna go away forever
I still have those feelings come up when I'm like
did I do a good job at that can I actually deliver that
can I do what I'm saying I'm going to deliver
did I deliver it was I good enough am I good enough
and I I again think it would be
I think it's healthier to have those thoughts
as you continue on
even if you've been doing this for 20 years 30 years
I still think that we want
a bit of that to kind of keep us grounded
and to make sure that we are delivering to our clients
now where it gets unhealthy
is when it stops you from actually
delivering or actually taking the aligned steps forward
and if you're beating yourself up about it
so
excuse me I'm sorry I don't edit these
what
I think is important right now for this is number one
allowing the imposter feelings to be there
number two knowing they will dissipate
over time the first time you do something new
they are going to be so much more intense
those feelings will be so much more intense
and like visceral than all the other times you do them
however
again I don't want to tell you like those feelings
are gonna go away and you'll never have to feel them after you do it once
because that's probably not true
and again I don't think it's meant to be that way I think we are meant to
kind of this is just part of
part of kind of the game of what we're doing is
being able to hold these kind of uncomfortable feelings
while also taking our aligned action
okay so let's just like
summarize a little bit of things um
things that to remember
that will help you move forward with this
so things to remember I wrote them down number one
it is normal to feel this way
I know I've said it a million times
but I really want to normalize this this is completely
completely normal you look at anybody
they have these feelings anyone you admire
cause they're like doing the thing they feel like this
they might not show it to you because
they're not going to but they're dealing with those feelings
and they've taken their aligned action steps
in spite of those
it does they have not gotten rid of them
so it is normal incredibly normal
again I think it would be weird
if you weren't feeling any of this
number two it will feel the most intense
the first time you do something
the first time you are super
super authentic on social media
the first time you do a paid reading for somebody
the first time you hold a specific type of group
the first time you offer some new offer
the first time is always going to be more intense
and that's okay and
it's okay if it still sticks
around the next few times and forever
the other thing I think is so so important to remember
is you know enough and your skills are enough right now
for the clients that are your best clients right now
the people that are meant to
take you up on your services
take you up on your offers to work with you
the right people for right now you are
skilled enough to help them
you are already have the skills you need to help them
and in the future you will have more skills
and new skills and you will be even more helpful
and you will be able to help in even wider range
of best clients
so no matter where you are on your journey
of doing this for like business purposes
not just for free no matter where you are
your best clients
you already know enough and you have enough skills
right now just as you are
there is always somebody that can be helped
there is always someone you can turn around
and there are few steps behind you or
many steps behind you
or right next to you you can also help your peers
but there is always going to be someone you can help
with the exact
set of skills that you have in this exact moment
and yes that will change over time
but that just means there'll be even more people
that are your best clients over time
the other thing to remember
is even if you do not have evidence yet
to help remind yourself like
I can do this I am doing this I do help people
I do fulfill on my promises
I do deliver what I say I'm going to deliver
even if you don't have a mountain of evidence
yet you don't have testimonials
yet you haven't charged a certain amount
and people have taken you up on it yet
you do have your own experiences most likely
if you are doing this in an in an aligned way
and you are listening to this type of podcast
you have already used your tools on yourself
you've already whatever you're offering to the world
and your people and your your best clients
you've already walked yourself
through that is probably how you Learned
how to do it so you can remind yourself you are
like your client if you have gotten transformation
or if you've been able to do things for you
you can make sure you're not kind of gaslighting
yourself about that and like wow
look at all of the things I've walked myself through
all of the wisdom that I now have and now I'm ready
turn around or next to you or wherever and
give that wisdom and deliver that to somebody else
so that is important to remember
and then I'm gonna leave you on like the worst
case scenario
let's just think like what's the worst case scenario
let's say
someone takes you up on an offer
they pay you and you don't deliver for whatever reason
something didn't work maybe
it doesn't even matter what it is
but you took their money
you went to deliver whatever it was
and it didn't work they weren't they're not happy
you're not happy with how you delivered it
you feel like you really didn't fulfill the promise
something went wrong
you just give them their money back haha
people
the right your right people are going to understand
either
okay I was off that day or maybe it's just not a good client
fit that's possible too
it might not all be on you it might be
just a combination of things that were happening
but you can just refund
them you can give them their money back someone's
not going to leave that and be mad at you and if they are
that's on them because you're
doing it in an aligned way
and this is a whole other podcast
that will do a different time but let's say your
whatever
session your court whatever went horribly wrong
and they
real and they really feel like you didn't deliver
you will learn so much it's not fun
but there is so much to learn through failure
and if you can have that perspective
of when something goes wrong
what am I meant to learn from this
what can I learn from this what can I do differently
next time
you will feel like you got even if you refunded them
you will get your money's worth
in I have a mentor that calls it failure gold
you will get your money's worth in failure gold
if something actually does go wrong and to the extent
where you wanna give them their money back or
another session or something
and you have the perspective of
there's no way you can actually fail
like there is learning to be had here
there's only learning that's all
so the absolute
worst case scenario yeah it's not gonna feel great
but like I'm sorry to tell you
a lot on this journey is not going to feel great
you will be feel like you're failing a lot of the time
and again
that does not mean anything's gone wrong it just means
there's learning to be had
okay so
I hope that was helpful
I hope that did not make it seem even worse
where you are
and
the biggest thing is it's normal
you're normal nothing has gone wrong and
we gotta take that imposter syndrome
feeling with us and take the aligned action anyway
that's the really the only way to work with it so
I hope you have a lovely day
thank you for being here so much love to you
you are doing so amazing I just know it and I
will see you or hear you
or you're you'll hear me I won't hear you
in the next one goodbye